Is fucking hot. Oh yes, Oh yes.
sorry, I needed to say it to someone who wouldn't rip me for it. Well, you might, but at least you don't really know me at all.
David is taking me out tonight. That's the boyfriend, by the way. We are going to see Quantum of Solace with some of his friends. I'm excited, I love James Bond. And I love all of David's friends too. The only big pisser here is that I'm missing Rachel's bonfire party, which would have been a great excuse for a shit load of cuddles. Just because I can't have her, doesn't mean I'm happy about passing up any excuse to be close to her.
She's so flirty with me all the time, and she know's how I feel about her. I get plenty of chances to be close to her, so long as I don't overstep the mark.
Like this lunchtime, when we walked into town and she wrapped her arms around me and said 'I love you.' So I held her close for a few seconds and told her I loved her too.
I know that's translated as 'You're my best friend and I couldn't live without you' from her.
No translation needed from me.
Then she looks up at me (I'm 5'11 shes only 5'4) with those big brown eyes and cute little smile, and I wonder how on earth I've managed to refrain from kissing her over the last 15 months. But I refrain some more, and she pulls away, linking her arm through mine and continuing to talk shit like she always does. And I know, it's because she needs so much as a friend right now, I couldn't bear to make it difficult for her.
My feelings go out of the window again, for the time being.
I tried having a break away from her, hoping I could get over her, and concentrate on mine and David's relationship, still naive then and thinking perhaps I could make myself love him as more than a friend. It didn't work, and when we started hanging out again a couple of months later, my feelings came back just as strong, and mine and David's relationship was still as one sided as ever.
My ex girlfriend had a baby on Tuesday. Well, I'm guessing it was tuesday, that was when she was due to be induced, as he was 10 days late and still comfy. No one will tell me either way until she comes out of hospital and calls me. Her family all hate me (I made their daughter gay) and her new boyfriend is still threatened by how strong our relationship was and how strong our friendship still is.
I need to think of something happier... uhhhh... Watching Season 1 of the L word again at the moment. Up to Episode 5, god I love that series.
I want to bitch and moan about the Prop. 8 thing in CA, and various over American tid bits, I do love following politics, even American politics, despite being a brit. But I'm at work, and I must go and do something productive before I lose my job.
So I'll leave you with this,